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Trust Broken, Forgiveness Given

Time heals all wounds

TJ Tijerina

TJ Tijerina

Cheyenne Whisenant, Commentator

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People wonder why I don’t trust anyone. When something bad happens and the people who are supposed to protect you don’t do that, you lose that trust.

You see I was 15 years old when my boyfriend, my ex-boyfriend, my first love, raped me in a bathroom at school. I was lucky, I didn’t walk away with bruises or major damage except to my heart, soul, and mind.

One of the assistant principles had walked in while I was trying to leave, after the damage had already been done. Not wanting to get into trouble the boy made me hide. So there I was standing on the toilet, full of shock and horror at the events that had happened, but I stayed silent. The AP had seen my stuff that had been thrown on the floor and knew something was wrong. So we were caught.

After writing a first statement that said nothing happened, ( I wrote this because the boy was sitting next to me threatening me not to say anything) I cried and told another principle what had happened. He said there was nothing he could do, because he wasn’t the one who caught me  wasn’t handling the ¨case”. So when I told the first AP that I had been raped, he said ¨I don’t believe you. Because then why would you hide?¨ Even my own parents, my father and my stepmother, didn’t believe me after telling them, granted it was 2 years later, but still why wouldn’t you believe your own daughter? I didn’t matter how many times I begged and pleaded with them, nothing happened; he still walks free on this planet with no consequences.

Forgiveness is something I believe all people deserve, even if they have ruined someones life. Learning to forgive is the hardest thing in the world, its harder than actually saying those 3 words. ¨I forgive you.¨ To that person that hurt you, they don’t even care. To forgive, I gave it time. Time heals all wounds, so while I sat crying, screaming, blaming myself, I also was healing because I was realizing that nothing will change that day, and there was nothing I could really do 2 years later.

¨Bad things happen, and there is nothing you can do about it so why worry?” my favorite line from Lion King.

Forgiveness doesn’t appear overnight. I had to give it 2 whole years and even though I still very much hate this person for what he did to me, I’ve learned that I forgive him. I am no longer mad at him or myself for what happened but I did realize it wasn’t my fault. I realized that it wasn’t my fault at all, and that me being raped doesn’t define me, so I just let time heal me and in the end, after everything he had done to me, I forgave him. I also forgave the principle for not believing me. Because their actions don’t define me, I make myself who I want to be.

2 Comments

2 Responses to “Trust Broken, Forgiveness Given”

  1. THERESA A HADLOCK on May 10th, 2018 2:05 pm

    I am so proud of you for doing this. If more would speak out it would be so much easier for people to understand. You are strong and beautiful and you will make this world a better place.

    [Reply]

    Cheyenne Whisenant Reply:

    Thank you so much! It was really hard to write this and then speak it but thanks mom for the support

    [Reply]

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